Hosting as a Homebodied Introvert

Given all the posts lately about reading, philosophy, and theology/church time, you may be wondering if I ever interact with people at home . . . the answer is yes! Hospitality is close to my heart, in part due to the exhortation to entertain "strangers" in Hebrews 13:2. How do these aspects of life blend?

Hosting as a Christian

For the Christian, hospitality may look a little bit different than it might for the non-Christian. A key difference comes in "whom do you host?" I'm referring to personal hospitality (in one's personal dwelling) as opposed to, say, a hotel owner. Rosaria Butterfield has written in several places about the ins, outs, and challenges of Christians being obedient to their calling to be hospitable.

• What's physically involved: an open home, a larger food/electric budget, and a unified church, an ordinary Christian life (versus "entertainment"), daily time especially when you don't "have" time
• Who does it: all Christians
• Who receives it: Christians and non-Christians, whoever enters our homes
• Whom it benefits: everyone participating!

I will admit that fact-finding for this section of the post was more surprising and challenging for me than I anticipated, as perhaps the following sections will show.

Hosting as an Introvert

One thing I learned after Husband and I started dating was that there are multiple types of introverts.

• Social - like small groups, enjoyable but draining
• Thinking - slow-paced, imaginatively self-reflective
• Restrained - slow-starting, slow-relaxing, fact-finding
• Anxious - very self-conscious around strangers
• Low-Stimulation - need to limit outside stimuli for overwhelm

As a couple, Husband and I form a mix of social and anxious introversion, which leads to some tension when discussing planned hospitality. I'm also more of the planner of us two, while desiring to be more spontaneous. When we host, this means several things: I'm the one doing the inviting and scheduling (generally); I'm the one responsible for changing decorations so I don't do that very much; and potluck-style simple dishes are the way to go!

Here's how our eating area looks this season:

Glimpses: Seasonal, Non-Instagram Hosting

In an ideal world, here's what I aspire to when providing hospitality. In all scenarios, the house is clean enough at least in toilets, sinks, and floors; and piles on seating and table areas are minimal.

Spring

This season is the time for walks in waterproof shoes, garden meandering, and occasional use of the fireplace. Longer days, and especially Daylight Savings Time, make me more optimistic and thus less hermit-like. It's not quite warm enough to eat outside, but couch meals inside are comfortable. Lightly scented candles are my go-to because so many flowers are poisonous to our cats. Library tours of our Christianly-organized library (HT: Autumn Kern of Common Mom) are a staple!

Summer

Dinner on the deck, preceded or followed by a board game and a library tour, uses many of the lovely features of our house and places guests in a comfortable environment where conversation flows. Our backyard is kempt but not manicured; in Zone 5b there grow an abundance of bee balm, sweet peas, and catnip. Things smell nice, there are (usually) few to no mosquitoes, and the evening sunlight puts everyone in a good mood.

Fall

Before the time change, at least, dinner can usually still be outside if one plans and layers properly. Otherwise, staples of our hospitality are the fireplace with rug in front, incandescent lamps, and ample comfortable seating with blankets and usually-cuddly cats. Particularly in fall, a library tour with a segue into theological and/or philosophical discussion facilitated by Husband is a staple of hosting to benefit all involved.

Winter

Due to the limited daylight, winter hosting is almost identical to fall hosting except for scheduling things during the day if I can. In our area, we get anywhere from 6"-6' of snow and ice over the course of winter. I add hot tea and coffee more often, and if mom supplies us with cookies from her greater baking time, some German-style Christmas cookies.

Did you get any new ideas for your hospitality practice?